I had an encounter the other day that was so subtle, in a room of 5 other people, only I noticed.
Perhaps I’m being overly sensitive, but I think not …
As I said, a group of people, who are also my friends, were visiting us in our home. They are all good people whom I like, but the person I was speaking to was really what I’d call an acquaintance. Making small talk, he asked what I did while hubby golfed. Well, I stammered around a bit and then remembered one of the things I do is I indulge my passion of photography. So I told him I loved photography, and spent a lot of time taking and editing photos.
He then told me how his wife loved photography too. As I was truly interested, I asked what she liked to take photos of. Well, she loves to take shots of nature, you know, landscapes, etc. etc.
This is where my sweet hubby mentioned that I have a blog, and share a lot of photos on it. It fell on deaf ears. He immediately mentioned his wife has a Facebook page where she posts her photos.
I then (quite out of character) offered to give him one of my cards so she and I could connect. But he simply said, well, I’ll give you one of my cards, which he proceeded to do. I took it and thanked him.
Fast forward to this morning. The hubs asked me if I was going to send my info to this person and I said, oh, probably not … . When he asked me why not, I had a hard time explaining. I had to think about it for a bit … and this is what I said:
I won’t be sending him my info because it feels hollow. He did not acknowledge my blog, and when I offered him one of my cards (which btw are artful cards made from my IG account), instead he wanted me to take one of his cards and, I guess, get back to him. Ummm … no. But thank you anyway.
I get that people are proud of their (or their spouse’s) accomplishments, and want to share them. Goodness knows I do!
But even if your end game is to show off your stuff, at least have the courtesy to pretend you’re interested in what the other person is saying. Or, hey! BE interested in what someone else is saying. How about it? do you think he was listening?
Day 7 of blogging every day in February.
Hi Barb. I got here from the link Kim Klassen posted in our One Year Wiser class. Turns out I’ve followed you on Instagram for a while and love your photography. I’m with you, I don’t think he was listening. Or at the least, not minding his manners. Nice to find your blog.
Kelly N says
I totally get that. And no, I don’t think he cared or was listening. He may think what you both do is frivolous. (Although he may not know anything about blogs- just giving him the benefit of the doubt) The thing that gets me is he was playing middle man. If he wanted you two to connect, he would have given you her info. (in my opinion)
PS. Love your table and chair image. I hope I can go to Kim’s someday. :)
Thank you Kelly. I also now see the “middle man” part … hmmm, yes, it may have been better if he had simply told me her fb name or something?
i would not waste my time either. :(
Dear sweet Barb, it sounds like he heard your words but certainly missed your heart (that desired to connect with his wife). I think there’s wisdom in guarding your heart and not give it to anyone who’s not interested…it’s too precious to waste. ?
Lisa Gordon says
Definitely not worth your time, Barb.
Ann Davis says
He probably does not listen to any one. My question would be why would he not call his wife over and connect the
2 of you together. Then both of you could decide whether you wanted to have a relationship. My guess is your info would never get to his wife.
Linda Hoye says
Rude is rude no matter how one might try to disguise it. I’d react just as you did. Love the table and chair photo, by the way. :-)
If his wife was not there, and she heard out you later if he happened to mention it at all. She’s probably be kicking him right now. I’ll back you on your (lack of) action.